FAKE IT UNTIL YOU MAKE IT.
GRIN AND BEAR IT.
SUCK IT UP.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?

These phrases have come up time and again over the last many years in conversations with my teenagers. The truth is that these phrases do not commonly come into my own mind. I don’t recall my parents using those phrases too often so I guess they weren’t drilled directly into my own psyche. Thank god! And anyone who really knows me knows that’s really not my gig at all. I don’t pretend to be anyone but myself. Almost 💯 at this point in my life. I am shameless and I own my life with pride.
Some people may not see me this way. That’s fine. I’m a person that some people might just call a hot mess. Yes. Others probably describe me as cold or sharp. Sometimes I am those things. And then there are some people who just call me authentic. It really depends on who is making the judgment call. I accept it all. I am who I am, as Popeye said. 💪🏼
The point is that our kids have plenty of influencers in their lives other than me and these well intended phrases got a little stuck in their psyche. They have received plenty of unsolicited advice over the years, as we all do. It’s difficult to filter it all, especially when we are young. And they know exactly who their mom is. They know I am tough as nails, kind of nuts, and am wholehearted. And I imagine that they may have thought all the things themselves about me. I guess I don’t really appear to be the norm in our circle. They know I don’t have my shit together all the time. But really…how can a person like me have all of my shit together? It’s not a simple life. Lots of moving parts. I think of it kind of like a freight train. The destination is always the key for me.
Destiny is all, as Uhtred says. I will keep praying and working hard to make peace. And I think you may be right, Cole. Peace may just be the devil’s aim. I’m coming to terms with the devils. Rest in All of Your Power, sweet boy. Now you are a real angel.
Cole Jackson Tucker ♥️⚕️🌻
4/30/2002-4/14/2022
https://feldmanmortuary.com/tribute/details/4452/Cole-Tucker/obituary.html
⚕️✌🏼♥️♾🌻✨🙏🏼